The last time I was at the Destinta theatres in Bridgeville, we saw The Dark Knight (the film was good--Heath Ledger was excellent--but the whole thing was at least forty minutes longer than it needed to be.) It isn't that I don't like the Destinta theatres. I'm very grateful they're there and I have the choice of seeing movies in big, empty rooms far away from the throbbing mass of teenagers one finds at the South Hills Village theatres. But there are so many things at Destinta that could be better. First, the cavernous lobby and dark, labyrinthine hallways are positively creepy. I've actually got about half a screenplay mapped out in my head for a teen slasher movie that takes place in the local cineplex, and every time I'm at Destinta, I add another scene.
Second, the deserted and quite possibly never-inhabited "extra" candy counters in the darkened hallways on each side of the Destinta complex perplex me. Was the intent ever to have the more conveniently located counters open? Or are they red herrings, designed to make you think that you just missed coming on a more fun night, a night perhaps when there was dunking for apples and a carousel and a brightly lit lobby filled with happy, laughing people?
Third, the slower than molasses labyrinth folk who staff the ticket desk and candy counters drive me bonkers. It doesn't seem possible that humans could work as slowly these people do without careful training. Typical transactions go like this:
Me: (waiting while teen finishes delightful story about running into Lisa and Emma at Hot Topics and they were, like, seriously weird.)
Teen: (remembering at last he's here for a reason) Yeah. What'll it be?
Me: I'll have popcorn, no butter, and a Diet Coke.
Teen: (shuffles off aimlessly, neither in the direction of popcorn nor soda)
Me: (listening to second teen who is manning the soda machine guffaw, waiting for the auto filler to finish) I wonder if the movie's started?
Teen: (returns with a cup) Did you say Coke?
Me: Diet Coke.
Teen: Ah. (throws full cup into garbage. Gets new cup, fills it, finds popcorn tub in cabinet under the nacho lights, fills it) Did you want butter with this?
Me: No, thank you.
Teen: The butter's over there.
Me: Got it.
Teen: For another eight dollars you can get our Movie Lover's package. That includes a box of Jordan Almonds.
Me: Ah, thanks but pass.
Teen: Your call. That'll be $16.75 (or some other figure that sounds more like the price of new shoes than a snack.)
Meanwhile, 3 teens with Mohawks, 4 men in sandals with poor foot care habits, 7 screaming children and 3 couples necking have fallen into line behind me, I've misplaced the ticket stub and can't remember if I'm in theatre 14 South or 47 North, and I realize the attendant's given me Coke. The process screams for optimization.
But how nice to imagine the Denis Theatre, with a coffee shop, friendly faces, lighted common areas and a theatre full of patrons happy to be seeing a movie and supporting their community at the same time. I can't wait.
3 comments:
Destinta is just a bizarro alternative movie universe. That the whole thing seems to be a resurrected airplane hanger with a neon face lift doesn't help its image. Take a closer look at the walls (note the texture particularly) on those travels through the creepy hallways... on second thought, don't take a look at those carpeted walls.
Regarding the employees, I've had similar experiences -- as a result of the polar demographic, however. Perhaps it is because I often sneak over there on the afternoons I escape from work. During these hours I encounter the retiree shift. I'm all for employing witnesses to the Jackson administration, but it's just something of which you've got to be aware upon entering. When the ticket seller calls you "honey" fourteen times in the time it takes you to request a ticket; exchange funds; and then realize you've been given a ticket to an entirely incorrect movie, you've just got to adapt to this pace... and leave an extra fifteen minutes to get into the theater before the show starts. But at least there aren't twenty minutes of commercials like you'll find at the Galleria or South Hills theaters. I avoid those at all costs. And Destina, I guess, is precisely that cost. On second though, just forget it all and make the trip to the Southside Works where at least you can get a drink at Claddagh to make it all go down that much easier.
Jay, I'm all over ya. Destinta really gets you coming and going. Ah, well. One of the reasons I like to shop at the Giant Eagle in the Virginia Manor Shoppes is because they employ disabled adults. When you think about it, it's really sort of the same thing.
destina is OK but it isnt really that special:0
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